Churailiya 
Churails Rock
Mood: Angry | Date: 12.16.06 | Views: 104 | Comments: 0
I feel my heart fall and crumple
The old aged scars scrape against the cement of reality
Fresh pain oozes out bringing back to my mind signs of mortality
I pick up my heart all torn and rumpled
Resilience, strength, the power to overcome all
I stand for such concepts yet I hurl in this pain so small
In all honestly why must I feel so strong
For one who barely means anything, I’ve done this all wrong
pyar karnay waalon ko kya,
woh to pyar kar ke chor de te hain,
pyar nibhanein waalon se poochiye,
ke pyar kis balaa ko keh te hain..
What happen to these statements made
These promises of loyalty of steadfastness and determination all fade…
Given up he has on me so fast, and pushed away my scarred heart so fast..
He does not know what pyar is, the true meaning of ishq he has harassed
The tears cascade down my check creating a land of pain
Of the past present and future all, for I am Abel and he is Cain
Slain by the one I trusted most, the one I surrendered my heart to
And Abel’s heart was torn to bits Cain betrayed him just like a Jew
So awake I am at this insane hour woken by this desolation
Tis myself, I am to blame, I let my self indulge in such infatuation
Stronger then that I am inside, yet this weakness I let arise
Thus I myself do admit that I deserve to be chastised.
-Maya
Mood: None | Date: 12.16.06 | Views: 91 | Comments: 0
My friend asked me how I could love someone and want to be with someone knowing the past that this person had put me through and knowing full well that he was capable of doing it again..
Yes I had been through a lot in my past that made me a wiser, more mature person, my past relationship taught me much about myself about life about what happens after love. Life isn't always perfect, people arent always sappy sweethearts to you, after the initial infatuation has died, one must work at a relationship to make it work. There plenty of times where I felt i didn't love him, but there were plenty of times that made me realize I was wrong.
life is about forgivness and forgetting the pains that ones been through but not forgetting the lessons that one gained from those pains.
Yes i have forgiven completely.. dont ask me why or how , i just have...
Can i love again, of course, what does love have to do with mistakes....
Am i ready for love again... I don't know but it sure as hell is scary...
I didn't go back to the pain and the fights... i choose to trust, forgive, and give a second chance to someone i love... but i am also much wiser as to how much i will be willing to tolerate this time around.
I hope that answers your question, friend ;-) I know you say that you could never have forgiven him if u were in my shoes... but u arent in my shoes... u don't know him the way i do... you dont have the history and love and good times that i did...
Please wait...
